Catalyst at Night Read online

  His fingers lather shampoo in my hair. How the hell did blood get there? Splatter. Right. I shouldn’t enjoy his fervent attention, but I do.

  “I know, but I won’t apologize.” He wipes soap from my forehead. “But if it were up to me, Eddie would be a rotting corpse.”

  I roll my eyes. His obvious disdain irritates me more every passing day. It’s a rare occurrence when I get to see Eddie through a small window. They won’t let me near him. Not even once. It makes sense, though. It’d be too easy to relinquish their hold over me with one snap of the neck.

  Demetri’s hands travel over my body with the harsh soap. Apparently, this excursion wasn’t meant for soft skin. Oh, how I miss the light fragrances of my body wash long since lost to me.

  “You know I can bathe myself,” I argue when he twirls me around.

  “Yes, but then I wouldn’t get to see you soaking wet under my care.” His lips connect with the back of my neck. “And I relish every moment that happens.”

  Goosebumps spread my body at his husky tone. No matter how many times we’ve fucked, he still wants more of me. Then again, his life is on the line here. I spin back around and can’t help but add, “You’ve seen that too many times, Demetri.”

  He chuckles. I like it on him. Wearing nothing but a smile is how I prefer to see Demetri. His fingers linger on the inside of my left arm. Alarm bells go off in my mind. Shit, motherfucker! Slowly, he runs his hands over the incriminating evidence. His face falls, but he doesn’t utter a word.

  With a sigh, he tears off his shirt. Fuck, but that’s hot. Demetri pulls a pocket knife from his pants’ pocket and inspects the blade. Dammit, if I’d known he’d had it, I would’ve swiped the thing.

  “What’re you doing?” I ask when he sheds the rest of his clothes and steps in front of the showerhead. “I’m done.”

  With his palm, he presses my chest until my back collides with the wall. The drastic temperature change sends shivers down my spine. “You may be, but I’m not done with you.” His heavy eyes lock on my arm and I instinctively hide it behind my back.

  He knows. God dammit, he knows my secret! I lunge to escape, but he holds me in place.

  “Don’t fight me or I can’t guarantee the knife doesn’t slip,” he warns, his tone serious.

  I shouldn’t like having his body crushed against mine, but I do. Gingerly, he finds my arm and lifts it toward him. He clucks his tongue when his fingers roll over the implant as small as a grain of rice.

  “And here lies the root of our problem,” he breathes, disappointment written on his features.

  Before I can argue, his blade slips through my muscles. My breathing hitches at the pain. I’m not used to being on this end of the knife. Within seconds, he digs out my secretive contraceptive. Rolling it between his fingers, he examines the specimen. It’s nearly expired anyways, so he did me more of a favor. I attempt to move, but he maintains his grip. Though, I was hopeful our seaside excursion would allow me to scurry for a new one.

  Demetri crushes the birth control against the steel wall. Pieces splinter at our feet along with water that’s finally warming. “If you hadn’t killed those men, it may have been another few months before I found your deceit.” He holds the blade to my throat, piercing me with his flint-colored eyes. “So, when you try to blame this on me, remember that fact.”

  My blood races at our compromising position. His muscular body thrives against me, and his cock expands on my hips. With my favorite weapon held to my detriment, I’m only turned on more. He won’t hurt me, not more than I deserve.

  Demetri’s breath collides with my mouth. Oh, to capture his lips with mine would be intense. My body craves it the longer I stare at him. Instead, he steps backwards, and I miss his firm hand on my flesh. His eyes consume my passion before he steps out of the scalding waterfall.

  The bathroom door closes quietly, signaling his exit to the adjoining room. In disbelief, I wrangle my thoughts and fight the urge to tackle him to the floor. That would only ensure my mother’s plan succeeds.

  Chapter Two

  I stare though the peephole covered with grime. I don’t even want to think about the last time it was washed. But here I am, pressing my face against it as I watch Eddie’s chest rise then fall ever so gently. The tubes and IVs connected to him—keeping him alive—set my blood to freeze. Never should anyone have to endure such agony as this. It’s barbaric. No, wait, it’s very skhodka. I hear my mother’s voice carry along the wind. And yet, my own family uses a man’s life as a pawn in their scheme. I don’t know why I expect more. It’s how things have been since my childhood.

  My fingers grip the pane, nose smashed to the glass. Eddie looks troubled in his slumber, though I can’t blame him. My comfort is that he can’t sense what’s going on around him. Such a fate would ruin us for certain. Honestly, I just want to set him free from all of this. He doesn’t deserve this web of lies and deceit. Eddie is pure and I’m going to make certain he never suffers at the hands of my family again. Once I escape with him, that is. Right now, we’re both screwed.

  “My beautiful daughter, you look glum today.” Alena steps into view, but I ignore her. It’s what I do best. She taught me after all. When something is difficult in life, we shove it to the side and forget it ever existed. “Watching the man you love so lifeless must be difficult,” she continues.

  “Not that you would know anything about that,” I mutter in return. “You leave before they can kill themselves.”

  I swivel my head to face her. I can’t help but drive my invisible dagger into her black soul over and over again until she’s dead. If I didn’t need something from her, I’d use a real knife. But I have too many unasked and unanswered questions.

  Alena takes a breath of the salty air then meets my eyes. “But I do, Mishka. I told you I kept tabs on you. I saw what your American father became.”

  “And still you did nothing to save him.” I grit my teeth at the memories of a drunken Chuck Goldberg lamenting his one true love. This conversation is turning my stomach sour quickly.

  She passes over my anger when she adds, “Your biological father was beaten in front of me.”

  “By your hand, I should guess.”

  She presses her lips together. “No. I could’ve stopped it, though.”

  Her blue eyes take on a faraway gleam. Good. Fucking stay there, Madre. I don’t need you.

  “I should’ve made them stop, but I was too afraid for your life.”

  Nope, not buying it. I return my gaze to Eddie. Ugh, just five minutes would soothe my longing for him. I don’t deserve an iota of peace, yet I can’t help but wish for one.

  “Surely, you understand my dilemma,” she prods. “Our country needs this.” She grabs my elbow and I yank it away.

  Fuck off. I’m staring at the one man I can never have. Despite knowing that, I still want to stare and imagine a different life with him beside me. “No, I don’t understand. Russia doesn’t desire a parasitic cult to replace another one.” I stiffen when she lightly rubs my back. Her fingers dance up my spine as if to music. “And you definitely don’t need a daughter to offer as a sacrifice.”

  Alena places both hands on me now. As badly as I crave to slice a blade through them, I’m shit out of luck and knives. Plus, my mother deserves a long and miserable fate.

  “And who’s this dad you keep speaking of?” I face her completely and her grip falls away. “You allege I have a Russian father yet this is the first I’ve heard of it since you dropped the bombshell on my wedding day.”

  She paces in front of me, her lips moving in silent banter.

  “None of the skhodka members I’ve associated with said anything about it.” I poke her shoulder. “You’re lying just like you lied about being dead.” My eyes slide over her in judgment. “Perhaps, you’re not even my mother and you stole me instead. I wouldn’t put it passed you.”

  Alena is in my face before I can draw my next breath. “I am your mother.” She emphasizes each syllable with more passion than I assumed she could exhibit.

  Damn, maybe she is my mom. I release the rest of my resentment for the time being. She looks apologetic. Hmm, I can use this to my advantage if I play it right.

  “Then as my mother, you should want to make your daughter happy.” I jerk my head in Eddie’s direction. “Give me five minutes with him.”

  Her eyelids narrow. “With your men in there, of course” I include hastily. She’s not buying my compliance. Well, I’ll have to sweeten the pot.

  “Let me visit with him every day for five minutes and I’ll make sure you have a grandchild by the year’s end.”

  I watch with bated breath as she spins my offer around her devious mind. It’s stupid to ask for anything, but dammit, I’m sick of this game. I deserve to get my way before she gets hers. Every mom should want a grandbaby, but mine just wants it as an additional chess piece in this game of hers.

  Alena wraps her arms around me and hugs me close. “As you wish.” She kisses my cheek. “But your husband will accompany you as well.”

  I open my mouth to protest, but she holds up her index finger. “Do not push me, daughter. You should be grateful I let you have a room beside Eddie instead of forcing his coma-ridden body to feel the bedsprings bounce when your husband satisfies you.”

  I rear my hand up to strike her and actually make contact. Shocked that she allowed such an act, I step backwards. The bodyguards surround her, but don’t lift a finger to aid her.

  She rubs her chin then smirks at me. “You only get one of those. I hope it was worth it.” She nods to her men. “Tomorrow you and Demetri will visit the American. Rest up, Mishka. You’ve a big day ahead.”

  ***

  His hands are warm. Lukewarm compared to the hold I’m used to in Eddie’s grip. Another thing to thank my mother for. I’ll add it to my list before I throw it into the ocean with sharks swarming.

  The steady rhythm of the machines keeping Eddie alive beckon me to trifle with them. It’d be so easy to unhook them, but I have no clue what it’d do to him. My guess is kill him. I can’t assume they didn’t put a failsafe into play when it comes to their prisoner. I can pass as a field medic, but not without knowing the combination of drugs coursing through Eddie’s veins. I’m sure it’s a doozy of a cocktail too.

  Staring at the sunken cheekbones of the ex-airman, I grind my teeth. He should’ve never been here. All this is my fault. If he ever wakes up, he’ll realize I’m nothing but trouble. Scandal and heartbreak follow me like a stray dog. I’m an attractant of all things terrible for a happy ending.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I spy the man supposedly guarding Eddie from me. Pah! It’s ironic since Demetri would have no problem with taking a pillow and smothering Eddie in front of me. I carefully press a kiss to my comatose friend’s hands. My five minutes are almost up, but I can squeeze out a few more I’ll bet.

  “It should never have been this way,” I tell Eddie. His face remains unmoving, but my words get a response out of the other man.

  “You knew we were destined, Mishka. Don’t play the victim.” He grunts when I jab my elbow in his groin. “God dammit, woman.”

  I smirk. How can I not? Accidentally on purpose hitting my so-called husband in the balls is euphoric. He won’t recover in time for a nightcap with me, so I’ve gained a day. I review Demetri’s perturbed expression. Unfortunately, he doesn’t look as put off as I hoped. His drown-worthy blue eyes bolt my ass to the chair I’m sitting in.

  He leans over and pushes the hair away from my left ear. “You know better by now.” His voice is low and sends shivers to my toes. “Pain is a turn on for me just as it is for you, wife.”

  This mountain man all but controls my every breath with his aura. Whenever I try to break away, somehow Demetri’s grip tightens on soul. Fuck, I’m so screwed. I need to escape him. Once this sinking ship docks, I will too. Or I’ll die trying. I can’t succumb to his love. It will destroy me.

  “Go fuck yourself,” I growl, hanging onto Eddie’s hand for dear life.

  Despite the hit to his family jewels, Demetri chuckles. He runs his fingers through his hair then toys with the shadowy growth on his face. I miss the full beard, but he looks ten years younger without it. “I’d much rather have you do that,” he implies with a straight face.

  I turn to Eddie and cringe as my heart pounds thanks to Demetri’s truth. I shouldn’t want to bang one man while I’m in the same room as the man who loves me more than he should. Eddie’s machine whirs, silence simmering around the three of us. Guards are posted outside and I’m grateful for the sliver of privacy.

  “I can’t complete this assignment, Demetri. You know that, don’t you?”

  Without warning, he hauls me away from the makeshift hospital bed and into his burly arms. “Then you’ll kill us both.” His eyes snap to Eddie. “And him too. He’ll be the first to go.”

  I push at Demetri’s hold, but it’s no use. His vice is both physical and emotional. I hate mixing the two in a relationship. It rarely ends well for me. “I’ll figure out a way to keep Eddie alive.” My eyes flick to the invalid then back to my captor-slash-co-prisoner. “I can’t say the same for you.”

  A morsel of worry etches in Demetri’s gaze before he disguises it. “You won’t leave me,” he states confidently.

  “Oh, yeah? Why would you think that?”

  He presses his cheek to mine, scalding it on contact. I feel our skin melt together at his reply. “Because you love me, and you’d miss me.”

  My heart thuds hard in my chest. It’s true. All of it. Notwithstanding his veracity, I can’t admit any of it. Not now. He’s heard me say it a multitude of times while our bodies mesh, but not in the light of day. Not when speaking the words aloud for anyone to hear would solidify another weapon to be used against me.

  His lips touch mine in the briefest of moments, and the after-effects wrack my bones. He has some nerve to make a move on me while the man I claim to adore is mere feet away. If Eddie were to wake up, I may kill him for what he’s seen. Showing unabashed affection gets people killed. I glance to Eddie. Or put in a coma. Demetri loosens his arms, but I don’t escape. It’s not what I want, and he knows it.

  Someone pounds on the door, signifying my allotted time with the prisoner is complete. I managed to squeeze a few minutes beyond my allotted five. It’s a win. Sort of. It would’ve been better if I’d found a secret hatch and smuggled away on the tide with Eddie in tow.

  Shoving Demetri, I straighten my blouse then meet his eyes. I shouldn’t have done that. His desire for me is scrawled across his face like an epic love story. Fucking men! He’s screwing up my life and yet I enjoy every second I’m in his tattooed embrace. Forced or otherwise.

  Chapter Three

  Punching in the agency’s phone number, I hold my breath as the call connects. The sway of the ocean rocks me off my heels and I steady my body in the cramped quarters. I swiped the cell phone circa 2004 from one of Alena’s boy toys. It’s a piece of shit, but definitely not traceable.

  The operator asks for my code. “Montezuma Raygun Velcro,” I administer verbatim. It’s a dumb ass code name but not like I can change it.

  “Raygun, do you have eyes on Echo?” the voice chirps.

  Hmm, yeah, Echo is Eddie. Fuck. I don’t really want to tell the truth, but it seems the CIA and FBI are sharing intel since we last spoke. “Affirmative. Echo is in my proximity,” I whisper. My hiding spot of the closet is ironic, but the one place I’m assured is safe. My bedchamber is bugged. Don’t ask how I know. But this tiny hole in the wall on the far end of the ships lower decks is secure. Hell, I hope it is. If not, someone’s dying soon and it sure isn’t me.

  “Ten-four, Raygun. Hold on for Static.” She puts me on hold before I can respond. I don’t want to talk to Static. He’s the idiot who took over as my handler last month. I miss Nickolas being my in-between man not this imposter. A frown creeps over face. But Nickolas is dead. At least, he was the last I checked. I’d still like to know where his body went. Bodies just don’t disappear in a church fire. Somebody has it.

  Yelling in Russian catches my attention. I peek through the tiny slots in the door, but only see the empty boiler room. The maintenance guys are on a smoke break for another ten minutes based on their schedule. “Hurry up, mother fucker.”

  “Keep it up, Raygun, and I’ll set off your GPS locator. It comes with a loud beeping sound. I’ll bet your comrades would enjoy digging it out of you,” Static’s voice rumbles across the line.

  I can’t help but smirk. He’s ballsy and has a temperament only a Russian can love. Damn, I bet he’s one of us. It’d make sense. “I’m undercover here. I don’t have time to wait for you to get your balls moving up to speed.”

  He chuckles then replies, “The Agency needs to brief you about your mission. Find a way to berth soon. An agent will meet you in the Port of London. He’ll be wearing a blue cap.”

  “And how do you expect me to move a ship full of skhodka members?” I jiggle the door handle, impatient at the conversation.

  “Oh, please. You’ve done much worse than avert a boat. You have twenty-four hours.”

  The line goes dead and I shove the phone into my bra. It won’t be difficult to convince my mother that London is where we need to go.

  I step out of the closet and stroll along the creaky steel bridge. I’ll be damned if the thing doesn’t break one of these times. My secretive calls are dangerous, but thankfully, once a month suffices for the Agency. Making my way up to the surface, I yawn in feigned interest when my bodyguards spot me. They rush over at lightning speed and pat me down. I swat their hands away before they reach my chest.

  “Where have you been?” one asks.

  “Oh, was I missing?” I poke his sternum then push passed him. “Better go tattle on you. Again.”

  Not bothering to glance backwards, I hear him curse prolifically. It’s rather fun to fuck with Alena’s men. I get why she likes to surround herself with the buffoons. It’s cheap entertainment.